Saturday, February 14, 2009

News story #1

A fire broke out in a single home on Annapolis Way in San Jose yesterday. Robert Kent, the man from the burning house, was pulled out from the kitchen when he was surrounded by flames. 
The fire started in the kitchen and then spread to the attic. After being engulfed by smoke and then being pulled out by the firefighters, he is said to have second and third-degree burns on 50% of his body, according to the San Jose fire Captain Rob Piper. A nursing supervisor at Valley Medical Center said that Kent was listed as in grave condition. 
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1 comment:

  1. AnonymousFebruary 19, 2009 at 10:18 PM

    The "news" isn't that a fire broke out ... it's that a guy had to be rescued from his burning house by firefighters. So start with the rescue, not the house fire.

    This should be a delayed identification lead, since Kent is not well known. So don't identify him until paragraph two.

    Use shorter paragraphs. Don't repeat info (pulled out). "...he is said to have..." -- who's "he"? Not clear from your sentence. Look up "percent" in the AP Stylebook.

    12/15

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